It's a strange, strange world we live in, Master Jack

These were the words from a nineteen seventies song by the Four Jacks and a Jill. I think they sum up the feelings of probably every generation from Adam until now. The Lord says (in Ecclesiastes?) that there is nothing new. Do I believe the Bible tells the truth. You bet. Why? Because it has actually been proven true so many times. No this is not about God and whether he exists or not, but I do hope if you don't believe in God then one day you will. What it is about is how thoughts progress I suppose. How did I come to blog about war or murder in my previous post? Shirley and I spoke briefly about it because of the statement in the news that Vlok and Co. were going to be prosecuted for trying to bump off Frank Chikane. That then led me to start thinking about my days in the Rhodesian war. What progressed from there was viewing archive material about Rhodesia and the B.S.A.P. and amongst other things, inevitably for me, Land Rovers. But for a change I don't want to talk about Land Rovers. What I noticed in this period of searching the internet about Rhodesia was where many Rhodesians are today. And I began to wonder why are they where they are. Why am I where I am?

On an Emmaus walk I heard the statement that if you have no idea who you are the world will tell you who you are. This I heard later in life than I wished I'd heard it. Especially when it comes to the extension of this and that is if you have no idea where you want to be then the world will tell you where it wants you to be. For many years I've not wanted to be in Johannesburg. But because I've allowed myself to be here, here I am.

I take my hat off to those who are where they want to be. Fortunately in life we can often rectify mistakes. However to anyone younger than me who might be reading my ramblings then take life with both hands, give it a good shake and know what you want from it. Never be dictated to by the world. Lead rather than be led. Follow your dreams; and indeed make sure you have dreams.

Circumstances will to a certain extent be instrumental in foiling plans but they can be overcome. Sometimes it takes time, but never give up. For a while I gave up. But no longer. Maybe age makes you realise time is getting short to achieve what needs to be achieved, but nonetheless we need to go for it. When I left the secure employment for the world of self-employment I decided that I was, at 39, young enough to make a change and too old not to. I did not want to look back on my life and say I wish I had taken the plunge and I wonder whether it would have worked. I would rather be able to, as now, say I'm glad I tried. Has it been all roses? Well, yes frankly. This year has been difficult but it has taught me some lessons.

So in one way I am where I want to be, that is self-employed. Okay I chose a profession that is not the most high paid but I enjoy it. But I need to realise another part of my dream that I have always been too scared to do and that is to move. Now it is even more difficult to do and that is because my children live here.

So to answer the question I posed earlier. Why am I where I am? Well briefly because I was too scared to take the plunge and move. Why are my children here in Johannesburg? Also because I was complacent. Just think they could have been somewhere more agreeable.

This now leads me onto another thought and that is what would they be doing now had I taken the plunge and moved from Johannesburg, but I won't go down that route for a while.

But I must add a concept that makes my reasoning about why I'm where I am more difficult to put into context and that is God's plan for our lives. Does he care where we are? You better believe it. Am I here because it's God's plan? Not necessarily, because I haven't always followed a righteous life and make plans often without consulting Him, so therefore His plan might be for me to be on an idyllic island in Fiji. Maybe His plan for me is just to worship Him no matter where I am. This is also another thought process now and one which I don't have the theological know how to answer. I suppose it's back to the drawing board or I suppose I should rather say back to the Bible, and seek God, to find the answer to this one. Aaaargh! Stop blogging now Kevin before I find too many things to have to sort out.

Hmmmm. It is indeed a strange, strange world. Or maybe it's just me.

Is it war? Is it murder?

When is it war and when is it murder? There is an area which overlaps the two. Defining the two is not always going to be easy. Why am I asking this? Recently reported on the news is that the State has decided to prosecute Vlok and van der Merwe for attempted murder of Chikane. When was this? During the time that S.A. was at war against the ANC. The ANC were laying bombs and killing civilians. The S.A. government were trying to prevent this and known ANC activists were targeted. Was the ANC guiltless because they were trying to overthrow a corrupt government? Surely then the S.A. government was guiltless because they were resisting their downfall. They saw themselves as the democratic government of the day, notwithstanding how we might feel about apartheid now.

This is a different scenario to genocide with the likes of Charles Taylor of Liberia and many others, some in Bosnia and surrounding countries. I am not Chikane so I might have a different feeling about the matter if I were him. But then I would have been on the other side of the government. Did I fight for S.A.? No, however I have fought for Rhodesia and I wonder to what lengths I would have gone, in similar circumstances, had I needed to.

Sure, one can say arrest and charge and take the matter to court. In war this is not always an option. People are killed in war. Kill or be killed. Did I ever try to arrest the terrorists we were fighting? Our orders, and it was accepted as such, was that you go out an engage the enemy and kill them. Any that survive you bring back. We were never told to bring them back and try not kill any. Only in special operations, that elite forces like Selous Scouts and the SAS were engaged in, were expected to bring in enemy officers for intelligence purposes. The foot soldier? Kill them.

Do I approve of Vlok and van der Merwe. That is neither here nor there. I think that when you are being patriotic to your country a person will go to great lengths to protect it and guerilla warfare unfortunately has ill-defined labels as who is the enemy. That is why guerilla warfare is engaged in; to make it difficult to find the enemy. Which means the opposing side, in this case the S.A. government, has to try and decide and identify the enemy and do what enemies do in war; kill.

That's why I hate war. When will there ever be peace. Definitley not until the Lord arrives that's for sure.

First off.

This is a new phase in my life. That is speaking out ideas, maybe even feelings and putting them out in the open. Why? Well I could be described as showing the world only what I want them to see but I think it is more of speak out when you have something of relevance to say. I dread having people around me who speak just for the sake of speaking because they constantly need people to notice they are there. I have a dog like that. She is probably the most vocal dog I have ever come across. The world needs to know when she is out (well that is her impression). In reality the neighbourhood actually doesn't need to know. Some people are the same. Here I am and you are going to hear me all the time whether you like it or not; whether what I say is relevant to anybody or not, and you have to constantly hear my opinions. The nice thing about a blog is that if you don't want to read someone's opinion on something you merely close it and read something else. Cool hey!

Do you want to read an opinion I have? Well not yet because what I am actually doing is merely introducing myself and how I see this going. It might, over time, change and then I become so obsessed with it that I become verbose and opinionated and begin to be the person I described in my first paragraph as disliking immensely. But then again maybe I don't. If you want to find out whether I do or not then you will need to read post after post after post after post after......

Whoa. Dr Jekyll is coming out already or is it Mr Hyde who is coming out already? I can never remember who changes into whom. In this ridiculously politically correct world it will probably have to be Dr Jekyll and Ms Hyde so that there is gender equality in who he changes into and then when he is Ms Hyde he is bi-sexual so that there is no offence to lesbians and when he is Dr Jekyll he is homosexual so that section is okay with it. But wait! He will also have to change colour somewhere along the line. How about green so The Hulk doesn't feel ostracised? But then maybe even poor old The-Hulk has to be PC and is now She-Hulk



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